So my parents have been getting me a box of pears from Harry and David for my birthday every year since I-don't-know-when. But my birthday is December 27th, so Messieurs H & D always assume that my pears need to be delivered before Christmas (which, I don't know if you were aware, like, everyone in the whole world celebrates); this year they got there so early that my dad had to give them to me before my birthday (!!1!!!1!) so they didn't go bad and then get H & D to deliver another box--on top of the third box of pears which my mother go me for my birthday. I am now obligated to eat about a million-billion pears or else be a bad son. Man, FWPs
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