You Gotta Know When To Hold 'Em

I am on a multi-week cold streak and have fallen well behind my roommate in our almost-endless series of a card game which is near-entirely pure luck. And I want to kill myself because of it. Man, FWPs

Forget What You Thought About Heaven, This Shit Will Blow Your Mind

thisthisthisthisthisthisthisthisthisthisthisthisthis.

First World Solutions.

But It Is The Internet... It Can't Fail Me.

Despite the fact that there are a billion and a half hours of winter olympics to be watched right now and nearly as many atheltes competing, NBC selfishly chooses to snow a minor fraction of what I want while covering all sorts of unimportant things like some speedskater's wife who is recently out of work and has a 5 month old baby. Who cares? I want to watch snowboarding and nbc won't even let me do that via the INTERNET. I thought that was the point of the internet. Give me what I want when I wan it. Man, FWPs

Cross-Country Excellence: The White Man's Burden

"I think you're going to have to look past the first world teams to find that camaraderie. Lo-o-ot of money poured into these ski programs for such disappointing finishes." Man, FWPs

Another Way My Work Computer Sucks

It only has Microsoft Office 2003, so I can't view any of your fancy .docx or .xlsx files. Man, FWPs

More Like Kathryn

"My maid totally cleaned my PS3 with soap and water." Man, FWPs

ColdStone

After being convinced to get a medium ice cream at ColdStone because it was only $0.40 cents more than a small, I have eaten 1/3 of it and can't move. There is just too much to much deliciousness to eat. Man, FWPs

Katharine's Audition Tape

My iPhone touchscreen doesn't work with gloves on. Man, FWPs

Sugar And Spice And Everything Nice

Cleaning the garlic press is a fucking bitch. Man, FWPs

If I had a motorcycle I would be there by now. Man, FWPs

Damn You, Zuckerberg!

Facebook has changed its layout yet again . Man, FWPs

Enhance...Enhance...

the only thing shittier than megavideo's "74 minutes of video per three hour period" policy is the fact that i have to use megavideo because my parents won't spring for tivo, non-basic cable or internet based on technology more advanced than two tin cans and some string. sofa king we todd head. Man, (e-)FWPs

Clever Girl

There is no satisfactory (or existent) discussion on the internet re: "What if dry land in Waterworld turned out to be Isla Nublar?" Man, FWPs

Good Thing I'm Not Trying To Be The Best At School, Either

Because if I were, this problem would really grind my gears. An excerpt:
" 'The nightmare scenario, if you will, is that you apply with a 3.5 from Princeton and someone just as smart as you applies with a 3.8 from Yale,' said Daniel E. Rauch, a senior from Millburn, N.J." Man, FWPs